So I go on Facebook and hit refresh. One of my friends from high school is engaged. OMG. When did all this happen? Friends are getting engaged, buying houses, having kids. Can someone zap me back to elementary school please?
I have actually been talking back and forth to one of the guys that used to make fun of me...okay all I can remember him doing is stomping in a mud puddle and getting mud on my new dress. Did I mention this was in kindergarten? I remember the most random crap. I know when my Communications teacher's second daughter's birthday is. Random. Even she was surprised lol...as was a lot of the class when I blurted it out. oops. That was awkward. I think they might think I'm a stalker. Uh, no. I just have a really weird memory. Just don't ask me to remember all my boyfriend's siblings birthdays. Come on, he's got 5 siblings...plus parents and a niece and two nephews. I'm not going to remember all that. Yet, I remember the day I finished my big drawing art assignment in highschool, the day my grandfather died, one of my cat's birthdays that I had when I was little, and other random dates. Ahh...and yet, I suck at history. All those dates to remember. It's so hard.
Sorry, got off track here. So, yeah. It blows my mind to be growing up like this and seeing all these people who I grew up with, whether friend or foe, and they are doing all these cool things. It still blows me away to see some of them with their own kids already...cute kids too..and a lot have kids that look eerily like themselves when they were young. I think that kind of freaks me out the most. I can't really tell if this is a good or bad thing yet. Although, I can't wait to be engaged and married and all that fun stuff, but at the same time, I can. I wish I could stay young forever and just keep on gaining the experience. Wouldn't that be awesome? Yes, yes it would. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and be an elementary school er again....even if that was some of the worst times of my life. I actually don't remember a lot of it. I wish I could. Every now and then someone says or does something that sparks a memory, but for the most part I remember being pretty anti social. I still kind of am. I would prefer to stay inside with my computer and my online friends rather than go out and hang out with people from school or whatever. It does get lonely sometimes, but the pro side of it is that there is less chance of getting hurt. I'll touch more on that because I have been burned so severely with my last serious friendship that I think I have some underlying issues as to why I don't make new friends, or at least try to not keep in contact with the ones I've made through school.
It's funny, I tell people I've been kicked out of two weddings recently, one of them 3 times. I like to see the shock on their faces. I also like that they probably automatically assume that I am probably to blame somehow. I know it happens, it's human nature to assume the worst. It doesn't always happen, but it does happen. It was definitely not me. I am probably the best friend you can have. Loyal to the end. I will get into this more though later. I don't know if I want to completely bare my soul yet. It leaves me vulnerable. Something I kind of take for granted. I'm the type of person that will tell you my whole life story in one sitting. I'm not narcissistic and I'm not conceited, I just like talking to people about their lives and I like to make myself as clear as possible to people. I like there to be no fogginess on my positions in things and I like to have people understand me. There is so much miscommunication in the world that I guess I try to put a stop to as much of it as possible, at least around me. I guess that is why I am so passionate about communication. It is an essential skill that is slowly dying away thanks to the Internet and all our technology. People are losing the ability to effectively communicate with one another. It's sad. That is why I am trying to ensure it doesn't happen, at least with me. I want to be as clear as crystal to everyone. I don't want anyone to misunderstand where I am coming from. I know there will always be misunderstandings around me, but I will try to prevent that from happening as much as possible. I assure you, dear blog readers(however many you may be), that you will get clarifications if you ask for them and you will always be sure that you know where I stand on an issue or whatever, although I think I will stray from politics and religion on this blog. If you want to read about that, you will have to go to another blog as mine will not be one to discuss those matters. However, I am always open to educated and intellectual debates on certain issues. I very rarely find them though.
So I bid you adieu, fair reader(s) as I need to end the life of this fly who keeps buzzing in my ear. It is most aggravating. Fair well!
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